It is Time!

"Bullying"

There isn't a day that we don't hear or read about "bullying" in our schools, our community, or our nation.  I believe we are dangerously close to becoming numb to bullying as a justification, rationale, excuse, or explanation for retaliation or worse - the taking of ones' own life or the life of others.

Why?

You would be extremely hard-pressed to find anyone who doesn’t believe bullying is wrong in any form.

Why then is bullying an issue?

Addressing bullying and moreover preventing bullying is more than a slogan, speech, poster, or assembly.  It requires more.

Again I must ask, “why”?

From my perspective we have completely lost sight of our individual and collective responsibility, accountability, and authority required of a civil society.  At a minimum a civil society practices and demonstrates respect of, for, and by each of its’ citizens.  Irrespective of whether or not we agree with an opinion, position, policy, law, or etc. – we respect the right, the fundamental right to disagree – respectfully.

In a civil society we call into question behaviors that interfere with the safety or well-being of others. 

In a civil society we take responsibility for holding others and ourselves to the behaviors we expect and require to ensure the safety and well being of others.

In a civil society we don't fear reprisal, repercussions, or retaliation for holding self and others accountable for interfering behaviors

Most people, however, don't know that bullying is a legal term not just a catchall phrase for inappropriate behavior.  Flippantly “bullying” is tossed around recklessly in the press without unpacking first the definition.  This is further compounded by the absence of a comprehensive approach to minimize let alone eradicate "bullying". 

Legislation at the local, state, and national levels exists.  In common is a legal definition that includes words or phrases like "pattern of behavior", "intended to intimidate", "gain an advantage", and "intentional acts that cause harm" to name just a few.  The forms in which these intentional acts occur include but are not limited to verbal, written, cyber, video, or digital.  They can be physical, non-verbal, via social media, or in about any manner in which communication can occur.

There was a time when it could be assumed that children came to school equipped with certain skills, knowledge, and experience associated with a civil society.  In a like manner, many if not a majority of students possessed a foundation of skills such as self-management, self-control, self-discipline, conflict resolution, or de-escalation strategies.  Today these are the exception not the rule.

 Further exacerbating civility is the absence of self-advocacy skills where individuals as well as groups are empowered, entitled if you will, with the "right" to advocate for their safety and well being.

Edmund Burke penned, "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." 

A civil society does not turn a blind eye on interfering behaviors.

A civil society does not choose to be deaf to interfering behaviors.

A civil society does not loose its' voice to interfering behaviors.   

The call for "doing" is clear. 

Our challenge is "how".

There are powerful strategies and programs that do in fact work.  Needed are the courage, commitment, and conviction to implement with fidelity. 

I want to strongly endorse these approaches I know from personal experience that work. They compliment one another.  Combined, these approaches provide our best strategy to address both the symptoms and root cause of bullying in our schools, communities, and society.

"Capturing Kids Hearts" (http://www.flippengroup.com/education/ckh.html) is fundamental and foundational.  It provides the answer to "why" we should intentionally engage each learner and adult.

"Make Your Day" (http://www.makeyerday.com) is the tool to learn, equip, practice, and monitor citizenship by both students and adults with respect, dignity, and civility.

The final tool and one necessary to proactively combat bullying and harassment is the "McGrath system" (http://www.mcgrathinc.com/mjm.htm)

If we are really serious about addressing bullying we will look at these three powerful strategies as comprehensive solution – we owe it to this present generation and to each that follows to equip them with the skills, knowledge, and experience to live and thrive in a civil society.